jiggly bits

Just when you think you have all your ducks in a row…along comes a goose!

As you know, hubby and I sold the home we had raised the girls in last year and bought a sweet little fixer-upper, just for us. We spent the last year fixing it up and were uber thrilled with the results. Wow!!! We could walk around in the nude, if the mood struck us. We could lounge in the fantastically relaxing Jacuzzi tub, jets blasting -- with the door wide open. Who was going to question? Who would even see? No one!!! It was liberating to be able to just let the jiggly bits jiggle, untethered and unashamed.

We came and went as we pleased. No more checking to be sure the kids were taken care of…they all had their own lives and neither wanted nor needed our constant input into their lives. It didn’t take nearly as long as one would think to get over the empty nest syndrome. Our nest was ours and ours alone and we had it feathered just the way we liked it, thank you very much!!!

And then…along came a goose, in the shape of our beloved 12-year-old grandson. Due to some absolutely heart-wrenching upheaval in his short little life, he has been placed in our custody on a temporary basis. Don’t get me wrong…we love him to death and both of us would lay down our lives for him in a flash…but…I raised three girls, what the heck do I know about raising a boy? Especially a twelve-year-old boy???? Talk about one very intense life lesson! Did you know that boys eat at least ten times more than girls of the same age and that they really do not like it when their Nana kisses them goodbye as they get on the school bus? Well, I know now!

He is great though. Keep in mind that we live in an adult community and have been given special consideration to have him with us for the necessary time and he truly fits in here like an old glove. He keeps us in stitches with some of the things he says and does. For example… “I’ve decided to not go to Bingo tonight, Nana…but tell all the ladies to have fun without me. I just think it would be best to have an early night, since I have school in the morning.” This was said with all sincerity…I swear I didn’t let the chuckle out until I was well out of earshot. This kid is 12 going on 50!

My office now houses a bed with six (yes six) pillows, a masculine comforter, one lovely little boy and a dog…a dresser covered with lego creations, binoculars and baseball stuff…an old desk holds an equally old computer filled with games for his enjoyment, but no internet connection…the floor of the closet holds piles of treasures in the form of legos, pirates, dinky cars and board games. And I sit tucked in my desk chair at the bottom of my bed…I used to think this master bedroom was pretty big! LOL

Life certainly has a strange way of waking you up and forcing you to take notice of what is important in your world…the jiggly bits are just going to have to be patient for a while longer!

Spring? What Spring?

Okay, so last night I went to bed feeling rather shitty, but happy with the knowledge that Spring was well and truly here. I mean the grass was green, I had a flock of robins fluttering about the yard, a few of the bulbs were poking their pale green sprouts up through the ground and the air smelled heavenly. Yes, Spring was well and truly here!

NOT!!!!

This morning I opened my eyes, spread the curtains on the bay window in our bedroom to try and catch a glimpse of the herd of deer who frequent the field behind us and to my shock and horror there is six inches of depressingly white snow on everything.

Who ever heard of a Spring blizzard? This is bizarre! This is not fair. I think perhaps Mother Nature missed the memo about spring either that or she is PMSing in a big way!

So, here I sit trapped in my beautiful valley once again by the snowdrft-clogged country roads out. I guess I can use the time to clean out a closet, scrub a wall or two or organize my file cabinet....nope, better yet I think I will get some writing done.

Hope you are enjoying a nice 'Spring' day wherever you are!

Has it really been that long?

Wow...I cannot believe it has been so long since I sat down and made the time to post on here. I have heard people say that if you're not careful, life has a way of just slipping past you, unnoticed...now I believe them!

We are settled in the new digs after one hell of a lot of hard work...but now it is ours and is as close to what we wanted as we are going to get, without winning the lottery.

I am the very happy nana of a beautiful 6 month old grand-daughter, Teagan. AND I am about to be blessed with another Grandson any day now. Life truly is good right now.

Now I really have to stopp staring out the window at the amazing country scene filled with 26 head of white-tailed deer, a flock of wild turkeys, rabbits galore, Canadian geese, ducks and too much more to list. I really NEED to get back to writing! The touch-ups of painting will still be there when I am done...right?

Have an awesome day all!

News from Jojo's place

Okay, so my life has gotten crazy lately. BUT I am determined to make Friday MY day. My day to write, promote and let everyone know what's going on in my world. So I will do my best to blog every Friday even if it means I have to run into the library and use their computers.

My newest story is out in the world and if you are looking for a fun sexy read you really need to grab a copy od Golden Fox and the Three Behrs. I am snatching minutes where I can to work on the next sexy tale...Little Red Running Shorts. Of course I have more in this fun series planed in my twisted mind. LOL

But...you may ask why I have to snatch minutes and worry about how to find a computer. Well, we sold the house we've had for the past ten years.Part of me says YAY while another part is very sad. I watched my two youngest daughters grow to be strong, beautiful women in this home. I threw parties in the yard for them as they graduated from grade school and high school, sent them off in gowns I had sewn for them in my office to semi-formals and proms. This is the only house my 11 year old grandson has ever known his Nana and Grandad to live in. These walls hold so many wonderful memories, it's going to be hard to hand over the key next week and walk away. But the couple who bought it are well known within these walls, as they are friends of my daughters, have been married two years and expecting their first baby. So, these walls will be filled with more lovely memories.

We bought a mobile home and are in the midst of totally changing it. We're moving all the interior walls to make the bedroom and bathroom bigger, turning the kitchen/living room into a nice eat-in kitchen...changing the 10 foot wide addition into a 12 foot wide addition to house the living room entry hall, storage room and of course my office. But, wow there is a lot of work and more surprises than I could have imagined! We already took the bay window out of the kitchen and put it in the bedroom (had to take out part of a wall to fit it through the bedroom door) that was fun! Yesterday we discovered that the whole roof needs to be replaced...did you know that when plywood rots from being wet it falls apart and flutters in the wind like tissue paper? Well I know that now! And of course, just as we were trying to cover the exposed roof with a massive tarp gale force winds picked up. I now know what it feels like to go para-sailing. I don't think it is a sport that I will be taking up any time soon.

More good news, My middle daughter is going to be a first time mom in September. Everyone has been calling the 'bump' he and saying its a boy. Well, she had her second ultrasound and guess what? It's a girl!!!! Yes! I am so thrilled! I can't wait to spoil her rotten. So, that's something else I am trying to snatch minutes for...knitting! I have a pile of white and pink yarn and a stack of baby patterns.

There are just not enough hours in a day!

Have a fantastic weekend everyone! I am off to find some hidden minutes.

Jojo xox

Not your kiddies Fairy Tale

I was told that shapeshifters and menage was hot right now and the moment I heard that my mind flew to that good old tale when one, two and three of the characters state...someone's been sleeping in my bed. Well, if you know me, you know where my mind went then!

Golden Fox and the Three Behrs is the end result of that little trip down memory lane. This is the buy link... http://tinyurl. com/23d3zl4 (without the space)

Tara, the pampered, blonde bombshell is a witch with a problem. She is hornier than a raging bull named Randy. Her grandmother has a solution...go for a walk in the woods!

The Behr men are from an old sleuth of shapeshifters. Unbeknownst to Tara they have a shrouded cabin in the woods.

As the sun sets ans the shroud falls the fun begins!

I had a blast writing it and hope you enjoy it. I am working on the next Sexy Tale...Little Red Running Shorts. I'll keep you posted on its release date.

Love Jojo xoxox

A new poem by Pam Ayers

This was sent to me by a lovely 70ish friend and I had to share it

For people that do not know Pam Ayres, she's a celebrity/poet in the U. K.A new poem by Pam Ayres

Oh, I Wish I'd Looked After Me Tits By Pam Ayres

Oh, I wish I'd looked after me dear old knockers, Not flashed them to boys behind the school lockers, Or let them get fondled by randy old dockers, Oh, I wish I'd looked after me tits.

'Cos now I'm much older and gravity's winning. It's Nature's revenge for all that sinning, And those dirty memories are rapidly dimming, Oh, I wish I'd looked after me tits.

'Cos tits can be such troublesome things When they no longer bounce, but dangle and swing. And although they go well with my Bingo wings, I wish I'd looked after me tits.

When they're both long enough to tie up in a bow, When it's not the sweet chariot that swings low, When they're less of a friend and more of a foe, Then I wish I'd looked after me tits.

When I was young I got whistles and hoots, From the men on the site to the men in the suits, Now me nipples get stuck in the zips on me boots, Oh, I wish I'd looked after me tits.

When I was younger I rode bikes and scooters, Cruising around with my favorite suitors. Now the wheels get entangled with my dangling hooters, I wish I'd looked after me tits.

When they follow behind and get trapped in the door, When they're less in the air and more near the floor, When people see less of them rather than more, Oh, I wish I'd looked after me tits.

My confused rant

What to do. What to do? What to do!

So, it has recently penetrated my ever so stubborn brain, that I might be writing in the wrong genre. Now, I am not saying that I would ever leave the romance or erotic-romance genre... I love it there. BUT... it appears the taste buds of the world are ravenous for well written m/m romances (erotic or otherwise). Up to now all my babies have been very hetero, of course 'Boundaries' has the added element of interracial threesome... but still hetero. The newest one, 'Cuban Matings' which is slotted to be released on October 1st has a delightfully flamboyant gay man in it and he does get his moment (or two) in the spot light. Many thanks to my friend DJ Manley for the boost in confidence with my first m/m love scene. But the main character is Max's bestest best, Anna.... very straight! Should I have put these two in the same story? Will readers accept m/m and m/f on the same pages? Does anyone really care?

Write what you know! I have... I do! I will... as I have lived in many a haunted house and have been surrounded with superstitions, apparitions and a love for anything vampirish my whole life, my newest WIP is a sexy vampire tale. You guessed it.... hetero!

Write what sells! What sells right now it seems is m/m. Can I simply switch? Could I do it justice? Yes I have gay and lesbian friends on the Internet and in my everyday 'real' life and see their love lives in the same context as any one else's... beautiful roller coasters of emotion. But, do I jump on the band wagon and write a tale of two men? Could I bring the same sensuality to that relationship that I strive to give to all my man and woman couples? Do I make this leap of faith under my own name and hope that any who have actually read my work (are there really any out there?) will follow and accept this change up?

I am so confused. I write because I absolutely love the idea that my words, which begin as floating little tickles in my brain, can go out into the world and entertain someone, make them smile, laugh or cry. But.... making a little bit of money from my beloved craft would be nice too. M/M is selling like hotcakes right now! Do I try for my slice of that pie or do I quietly continue icing my hetero cake and wait for those faithful few to come and sneak the crumbs?

A well written story is a well written story... does it really matter the gender of the lovers? Apparently it does. Oh, what to do! I'll try to let you know how this works out.

Bar-b-qued Coffee

Okay, so Sunday morning I popped out of bed at a little before 7 and looked outside with amazement. Everything within sight was blanketed in ghostly white mist. We could see the actual movement of the air as the fog billowed and rolled down the street. Add to this the fact that at sometime through the night our township's hydro went down. So we had a very foggy blackout. Really rather eerie when you think about it.

But was that where my mind went? Heck no! It immediately flew to the fact that without hydro, how on earth was I going to make coffee... and how would we stay cool in the 32 degree Celsius (43 with the humidex) day ahead of us?

Well, first things first. I plopped the kettle onto the bar-b-que. No, not on the grill... ours has a very convenient burner off to the side. It blackened the outside of the kettle, but the water boiled perfectly and we had our coffee! YAY!!!

An hour later our eldest showed up with her hubby and son. On went the kettle again and we enjoyed our coffee while watching the fog continue it's speedy retreat. Thoughts of how to survive the heat and humidity flitted through our minds until Charity came up with the perfect solution.

We packed a cooler full of cold drinks, sandwiches, fruits, and other assorted yummies and headed to Port Burwell. Lake Erie welcomed us with amazing white crested waves, scorching sand and an endless blue sky. Clearly many others had the same idea as us, but we were able to find a relatively quiet spot for our blankets and settled in for the day.

(Now, when Charity tells this next part of the story she makes it sound much worse than it actually was. I stand firmly on my standpoint that I did not in fact sit there and let her nearly drown.) We had two blow up pool chairs that have holes at the foot area. We had spent ages towing them out as far as we dared and letting the waves push, drag and roll us back to the shore. We had done this so many times positioned head to toe, with our arms linked through the foot holes that our arms were exhausted. I had the brilliant idea that if we overlapped the foot holes we could both stick our feet through and would be lock together and save out arms. It worked perfectly... until one enormous wave crashed over us and sent Charity tumbling into the drink. Keep in mind that her feet were tucked into the hole locking us together. when she flew off the chair, one foot slipped out but the other stayed firmly in place with the plastic wrapped tightly around her ankle and mine. From my position on my chair I tugged, twisted and struggled with the clinging plastic as wave after wave rocked us. Charity bobbed up and down, beside and beneath the flailing chair. I knew if I let myself tumble in with her, we would both be stuck.

Charity's yelling went like this..."Mom...blub blub blub. I'm stuck... blub blub blub. Help... blub blub blub. I can't get out... blub blub blub."

My yelling... "I know, I'm trying. Stay still. I don't know what to do!" Of course the whole time I was laughing hysterically, because a) I was panicking and b) it was funny. Eventually we both calmed down enough that I was able to pull my foot out which released hers and she was able to stand and look at me with and expression of absolute disbelief. "I don't know what to do? This is what you say when your child is drowning?"

"Sorry honey. I really am sorry. I am so sorry." Of course I was still laughing so hard all she could think to do was tip me off my chair.

Maybe I really do deserve that certificate she gave me for mother's day when she was six. It claims that I am indeed the worst mommy in the world. But... she still loves me.

My Author Page is up and running

My books are now available on the Kindle format. On Amazon I have an Author Page. Check it out... http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B002DEZHKY

Now, Anyone who knows me, knows that I am not very computer savvy, so this took some doing LOL But i think it'll be worth it. Not all of my titles are up on the page yet, but I promise that I did indeed dot all the 'i's' and cross all the 't's'. It just takes a while for them to appear.

Now I must get back to writing... I have a deliciously tall, dark vampire whispering seductively in my ear.

Have a beautiful day everyone!

What is wrong with these people?

We live in a rather small community and one would have thought that we'd be sheltered slightly from the insanity of the bigger cities...NOT! We have it all, drunks, druggies, vandals and now murder and downright stupid.

I am about 15 minutes south of Woodstock. I am sure most, if not all of you have heard of Victoria "Tori" Stafford by now. The sweet little 8 year old who was abducted on her way home from school on April 8th. This case basically took over my life for the six weeks we all hoped and prayed to bring her home alive and well. A week ago, it was made clear that that will not happen. Two people have been arrested for her murder. The female baby-killer supposedly tried to help the police locate her body but just couldn't quite remember were it was. The man (and I use that term loosely) is crying buckets in his jail cell claiming he had nothing to do with it.

I am so angry! There was no Amber Alert put out for this little angel for more than a week. What does it take for a missing child to be put on that alert. The police had video of her abductor walking with her from the get-go. The parents gave them every piece of information possible and still they waited. Idiots!

****

Then on Sunday a bright orange rescue helicopter flew over our house. It was so low the sound of it shook the windows. I knew it was stupid, because they aren't looking anywhere near here for Tori, but my first thought was... OMG maybe they found her here! We hopped in the truck and drove the two minutes to the other side of town. No they weren't looking for her... some idiot was driving his big yellow quad, drunk out of his tree, bottle of beer in hand and 1 1/2 year old grandson between his legs. He tipped the bottle to take a slug and fell straight back off the quad onto his head, on the road. The quad kept going and the baby fell off into the grass across the road. The helicopter airlifted gramps out and baby went to get checked out in an ambulance.

So... what is wrong with these people? Don't they realize that children are innocent, trusting little souls who rely on us for their protection? Maybe I am the weird one, but I walked my girls to and from school, or made sure they were in a group until they were at least ten... I knew where they were at all times until they were inn their mid-teens... I never, ever let them get in or on a vehicle with someone who had been drinking. I protected them. Maybe too much, but that was my job!

It's a sad, sad world we live in.

Easter -- Tori

Well this was a strange and somewhat strained Easter weekend.
On the one hand I have three lovely grandchildren who all came with their parents, as well as my youngest and her beau to our house on Sunday for festivities. We ate until we felt we would burst, we hunted eggs, we played a rousing 2 hour game of giant snakes and ladders on the living room floor, we watched Jesus Christ Superstar (family tradition). The kids got along, even my girls all got along. It was all in all a nice day.

Sadly the undertone of it all was rather subdued. We all did our best to keep the spirit up for the sake of our youngsters, though.

We live about twenty minutes from Woodstock, Ontario. Tragedy struck there last Wednesday afternoon. A beautiful little eight-year-old girl named Victoria (Tori) Safford went missing after leaving school. The same school my daughter attended when we lived in Woodstock. Surveillance video from the neighbouring high school shows her walking with a woman, just after school let out. No one has seen her or heard from her since. The story is being carried in every paper, on all the news, even Canada AM is carrying it. Last night more than a thousand people joined together in a candle light vigil for her. Every is wearing purple ribbons or purple shirts (Tori’s favourite colour) Her family has posted a reward for her return. Follow this link to the facebook page about it; look at the pictures… who knows where she is by now maybe you have seen her! http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/group.php?gid=67560362225&ref=nf

AS far as I know there still has not been an Amber Alert put out for this sweet little girl. The reason being given is that the police don’t have enough evidence of an abduction (ie/ no vehicle) DAMMIT shouldn’t an Amber Alert be put out for ANY missing child? This is an eight-year-old. Its not like she’s a teenager who didn’t feel like going home!

Happy Ever After?

Does a love story need a Happy Ever After ending to be considered a good story?

I know that we all like those HEA endings. Who wouldn’t like the hero charging up on his valiant steed to take his beloved away to a life filled with love and contentment? Who doesn’t want to see them walking hand in hand off into the sunset?

We all like stories that are wrapped up with nice happy bows at the end and leave us feeling that all is right in the world. It gives us all hope that even in the worst circumstances there is a chance that our on stories will find a way to end happily. Doesn’t it?

But does there HAVE to be a HEA? Is a romance still a romance if it’s not for life? Is it still as moving and heart-capturing if it leaves you weeping for the characters? Most of what I write has the required HEA, but my story A Time to Dance doesn’t. Does that make it less of a romance? I say… NO. Sometimes in life in order to see and appreciate the good, the wonderful, the beautiful, we have to also witness the bad, the tragic, and the ugly.

What about Love Story? A very good movie. A wonderful book. An extremely tragic ending.

What about Romeo and Juliet? They overcame so much and thought they had the own happily-ever-after all worked out. Another tragic ending.
So, my question you is this… Does knowing that there is no Happy Ever After make you turn away from a book? Even if it could possibly be a very good read? Do you as a reader need a HEA?

The Afterlife

I am now entering my after life.
What?
Glad you asked.
I am about to find out what life is like after kids. For twenty-seven years I lived for my kids. For twenty-seven years they were my very first thought each morning - their first step, their first word, their first day of school, their first loose tooth, their first date, their first car... the list goes on seemingly forever. For twenty-seven years I have been a mum. I will still be a mum, but not in the same way. Who would have thought when I brought each little pink bundle home from the hospital that all the firsts would fly by so fast.
I was secretary and president of the PTA. I helped out with fundraising... I even ran a dance-a-thon... I trudged them to school when they weren't ready for the test, I marched them into the doctor's office when they pulled some foolish stunt and needed stitches or were so ill they just wanted to be in bed with a 'pillow boat'. I watched with amazed pride as they performed and as they graduated. I sobbed as I watch two of them stroll up the aisle on their daddy's arm. I held tight to my eldest's hand as she brought the miracle of my grandson into the world.
Now, my youngest... my last little bird is spreading her wings.
I will be left alone with my second husband for the first time in twenty-two years. Don't get me wrong, we have been alone before, but the girls were always near, even when we were up north they called every day. I still mothered them.
This is different. This is a whole new place I am walking head first into. This is the after life.
Do I even know how to have a life? My own life? What if the girls were the only thing that held hubby and I together? What if he decides he doesn't even really like me? Or vice versa? What will we talk about? What will we do? Of course, his idea of being able to walk about the house totally in the buff with not a worry of being caught is fine for him... I would never be one to reject the chance to see him in his altogether... but I am much more comfortable hiding within the baggiest clothes possible. Maybe part of my new life will be to get back into the shape I was twenty-seven years ago, so I can join him in his altogether.
I'l let you know how I survive this transition. Any and all advice gratefully accepted.

See You Next Tuesday

Okay so I am the first to admit it. I don’t always make a lot of sense. But I just can’t get past this one issue.

I can label the most interesting part of a male’s anatomy with any word possible. It’s a penis, a pole, a shaft, a schlong, a wanker, a cock, a dink, a dick, a knob. And there are many, many more. It all depends what mood I am setting in the scene that I’m writing.

I love words. I love the many different ways you can use words to bring about a plethora of different emotions. I am not a prude. I don’t shy away from using profanity in my writing, if it is called for. I calls it as I sees it, most of the time.

There is one word that I don’t say and find it extremely hard to write or even think. See You Next Tuesday has always been acronym of choice in my house. Now don’t get me wrong I can label the female sex just as fluidly as I can the male, probably more so.

There’s pussy, vulva, lower lips, cleft, box, core, love tunnel, clam, gash etc. etc. I just cannot use that one word. I even understand that it is used freely in some places of the world in very much the way I would use the word bitch, so what is it with this word.

Yes, it’s vulgar. Yes, it was grilled into me as a youth that it is one of the worst words. Yes, I grilled it into my girls that it is by far the most insulting insult possible. But, why? Why this one particular word?
Does anyone else have a problem with this word? Or, do you have a different word that gives you chills? I would love to hear from you.

When life hands you lemoms...

In my life I am lucky enough to have a number of people who inspire me. One in particular is an aunt who is mine through marriage. She is our adventurer.

She has skydived, just to see how it felt.
She and her group of friends have gone to Hades to help out at hospitals and an orphanage. They even transported an entire playground over there and built it for the children.
She has swam in the ocean, even though she has a major phobia of drowning and is by no means an avid swimmer. (She wears a life jacket in the pool, for pete's sake!)

This time, she and her gang trooped on down to Honduras and zip-lined. sounds like fun, right? one tiny little problem though ... she could not get the dang thing to slow down, let alone stop. So, rather than do a full face plant into the rather massive tree at the end of the first line, she put her foot up. Result -- broken middle toe and ball of her foot as well as pulled muscles in her back and scrapes and bruises.

She never got to finish the rest of the lines or soak in the hot springs. They took her to a private hospital, where she was xrayed, cleaned, bandaged and casted. The hospital gave her their very best 1920's era crutches and some very good, if unknown, pain killers.
Back at the resort, she was moved to a main floor room and treated like royalty for the duration of her stay. She had some pretty interesting signatures on her cast, including the doctor, who she plans to stay in contact with.

Did she call home and worry her husband and kids? No! It happened on Thursday and she didn't say word one about it until she was back in Toronto on Monday. Did she complain about the safety of the zip-line company? No! She praised them for their care and speed at getting her the medical help she so desperately need -- as well as them paying for it all. Did she bitch and gripe back at the resort? No way! She laughed and joked through the last half of her vacation. She told anyone who asked, that she was having wild, crazy sex and smashed her foot off a cement wall. (Some people really do not get her sense of humour)

She and her group of friends are already planning their next adventure. Look out world -- these ladies are coming!

She is one of the best lemonade makers I have ever had the priviledge to know!

The start of a new year ... again!

How many times has the chime of the clock at that magical hour, or the dropping of the ball at that same precise moment brought promises of bettering ourselves or the world from our lips? How many promises have you made and broken? Or, maybe you are one of the few that actually followed through with your promise. I salute you if this is the case.

My personal list of broken or forgotten New Year's resolutions over the years is longer than the road leading to my door... and that's pretty darn long. I vow to get in shape - What's so wrong with the shape of an apple anyway? I vow to lose weight - I am positive I keep finding that which everyone else has lost instead! I vow to quit smoking - well cutting down is a start anyway. I vow to do something good for the enviroment - does letting the grass grow longer to help fill the air with oxygen count? I vow to be a kinder, gentler human being - until someone messes with one of my kids, anyway. I vow to... The list goes on

So this year I have made one and only one resolution... I will do everything I can everyday to be the best me I can be! That should just about covered it all.

Have a fantastic year everyone!

Jojo xo